


The Medical Law Exam

by goodwineandcheese



Category: Monster
Genre: Canon Divergent, College, Drinking, Emotionally Confused Rudi, M/M, Psychoanalysis, Slightly Drunk Tenma, Tsundere Rudi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-21
Updated: 2018-09-21
Packaged: 2019-07-15 05:22:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,996
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16056383
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/goodwineandcheese/pseuds/goodwineandcheese
Summary: After the exams are over and Gillen reclaims his status at the top of the class, he confronts Tenma and calls him out on not mentioning anything to the professor. Just what debt does he owe?





	The Medical Law Exam

**Author's Note:**

> Idk man I just 199% feel this could have been an excellent pairing back in college. So I played around with it. Rudi's so tsundere I cry
> 
> Don’t take this fic too seriously lmao I was snickering through writing like half of it.

In the beginning, there had only ever been Rudi Gillen. There wasn’t a single classmate that could match his intellect, and he was looked on from a distance with awe and incredulity. But what should have been a perfect run through college, top marks from first to final year, was marred - sullied by the introduction of a random element, an unexpected variable that threw everything askew. 

The mild-mannered and polite anomaly was a Japanese student who had recently arrived in Germany. His grades were as unparallelled as those of the dethroned Rudi, the two engaged in an unspoken and unofficial battle of wits to determine the superior mind. But there was a new parameter in the equation to success, added - knowingly or unknowingly - by his opponent. Where Rudi could match the mystery student’s brains, he was tragically lacking when compared to the Japanese man’s natural charm and magnetism. On the social playing field, the Japanese student was superior.

That student named Kenzo Tenma...an unpredicted piece thrown into the academic battleground late in the game...ran the risk of surpassing his fellow intellectual. Their grades were practically parallelled, in most classes. Of course, there were better and worse days for the two; Rudi paid careful and close attention to the charming student’s marks - when they were at their peak, and when they fell beneath his average. He sought patterns - weaknesses, ways to read his classmate. He wondered if his opponent was doing the same. 

Often he would catch looks from the Japanese man - he would glance backward over his shoulder to Rudi, and smile. But surely there was more to it than a simple friendly greeting. Rudi never returned the smile, nor did he wave, but every wednesday in Psychiatry, then again on thursday in Medical Law, and on friday in Pharmacology, it was always the same - a backward glance, a wave, and a smile.

A friendly gesture, or a taunt? Was he so confident in his abilities? Even with that smile, Tenma managed to carry such a superior look about him. Of course, it was premature; Rudi had every intention of finishing at the top of his class, no matter the challenges. No matter the sacrifices.

Rudi sat alone in the library. It was before noon, so he was almost entirely alone, except for the odd panicking student trying to finish his or her papers. Anyone so careless as to leave final reports so late deserved every bit of the anxiety that wracked them as deadlines drew to a close. Or...maybe not. But in his own stress-induced state it was hard for him to bear any sympathy for slackers. 

He’d finished most of his exams; the only one left now was Medical Law, often called “the cutoff class” by older students. It was one of those courses used to weed out the inferior, those unsuitable to follow through with such a high commitment that later years of study required. Rudi wasn’t concerned about passing, of course; he knew without a doubt that he could at least score a 70% on his final with what he knew. But that wasn’t the _problem_. It wasn’t _passing_ that he was after. He demanded _success._

The only measure of success he recognized was to hold the highest mark in all his classes, to regain his stolen crown from Kenzo Tenma.

Rudi glowered at his textbook. _Kenzo Tenma…_

He was holding informal study sessions with a few of their classmates. Once again he took steps to surpass Rudi, this time using his popularity as a tool and flaunting his intellect. How mighty he must feel, to boast like that.

“Not for long.”

He spoke confidently to an empty room, but no matter. Rudi was satisfied regardless. He pored over the topics in front of him, words starting to swim in his vision, black on white becoming too painful on his eyes. The most troubling part about Medical Law was that on top of being _difficult_ , it was also unbearably _dull._ The content of the textbook itself was fascinating within its own right, but presented this way it was an absolute snooze. 

His strength in the course lay in his retention; while laws of medicine varied greatly from country to country, recalling information had always been more of a strong suit for Rudi. If he heard something repeated back to him, or repeated it himself, he had an easier time recalling information. Where he _struggled_ however was the theoretical, the hypothetical...the _arguments_. From the study guide, they were presented with several situations where the ethics seemed to fall in a grey area and told to either defend the practices or oppose them, using the laws as a basis to make their claims. Of course, it was never simple; far too many laws had ambiguity to them. And, even when Rudi knew his reasoning, putting it into words was more trouble for him.

He stared at his textbook, wiping his brow in annoyance. He really wasn’t sure how he was supposed to study for th-

“Excuse me. Do you mind if I sit here?”

Rudi’s head snapped up, his eyes released from the spell of dizzying small black print that was almost nauseating. In front of him was none other than Tenma himself, smiling that _smile,_ his eyes closed lightly. Rudi narrowed his eyes, sitting back and shrugging. 

“Suit yourself, I suppose.”

He was polite enough; there wasn’t much point in antagonizing the other student, and Rudi wasn’t particularly interested in starting conflict so close to exams. Tenma gave a small nod of affirmation as he pulled out a chair, taking a seat and depositing his bookbag on the floor beside him. “I thought I’d take a little time before the study group meets. Are you sure you don’t want to join us? You’re always welcome…”

Rudi glanced between Tenma and his own study notes, grimacing just slightly. He would remain cordial, but like this….it was hard. Because he _knew_ what Tenma was doing. This wasn’t about being the _friendly fellow student_ \- it was a play for power. He wasn’t just suggesting that Rudi join him - he was implying that he was the smarter of the two by offering that Rudi join _him_ \- so as to say… _you can learn from me._ It was also a play at social superiority - _I’m the nicer and more popular of the two of us, therefore by inviting you I maintain my polite and pleasant attitude while simultaneously waving my status on the social hierarchy in your face._

It was clever. Tenma was very good at those subtle games. But Rudi was far too well versed in the workings of the human mind to fall for it. 

Tapping his pencil against the table, he shook his head. “No, that’s all right. I’ll do just fine on my own. I don’t need your help, but thank you.”

He watched that smile falter somewhat, and couldn’t help but feel a bit of pride. He’d been diplomatic about it, but his own message was clear enough; _I’ll come out on top without you._ But just as quickly as it had disappeared, Tenma came back with a subtler smile and a shrug.

“Well, if you change your mind, we’re going to be in the Ernst Building, the lab in room 201. You know where to find us.” The Asian gave a moment’s pause, looking over at what Rudi was reading. He made a face, shaking his head.

“It’d be nice to have another week to study. This is even worse than organic chemistry.”

What was this, casual conversation now? For what? What did he gain? Was Tenma really _that_ desperate to engage in a social duel so close to exams? Or perhaps he wanted to give an informal test of their knowledge even before the exam. Rudi had no time for either; he gained nothing from pointless dialogue, and...he would find out soon enough which of the two of them was the superior intellect.

“Sorry. If you don’t mind, I prefer to study in quiet.”

Tenma looked away sheepishly, clearing his throat. “Oh, I’m sorry. Well...in that case, I’ll head over now...anyway, good luck with studying. _This_ is one exam I’m actually a little worried about!”

Rudi watched him stand to leave. Tenma had such a perfect smile, one wouldn’t even recognize the insult those words carried; wishing him luck, then following up with lighthearted concern that he _might_ struggle….as if to say, _you’ll need the luck...but I only might._

“And good luck to you too, Tenma.”

The Japanese student paused, giving him a look, though he didn’t say anything, smiling that smile again and giving a wave as he left. Off to cavort with the other members of their class...just how much studying really happened in those sorts of sessions? Well...it would certainly boost Tenma’s ego, at least. By far the two of them were the most intelligent in their class; but unlike Tenma, _Rudi_ didn’t flaunt it about.

* * *

The Medical Law exam was at the end of the week, thursday at noon. That gave Rudi a grand total of three days to increase his projected score. In all of his practice exams, the highest he’d reached was a 74%. Not nearly high enough to compete with Tenma. 

He spent those days between his dorm and the library. He would have holed himself in his room exclusively, but he knew well enough that the mind required breaks, and he required at least some amount of activity in a day. The trip between residence and the library was suitable. Most students forgot to take care of themselves almost entirely during the week of exams.

Even Tenma, it seemed.

Rudi tried as much as he could not to focus on his adversary during the last few days before the exam, but it was hard not to notice him in the library the few times he saw his classmate. He was still clean cut and decently maintained, but he wasn’t nearly the crisp gentleman he often appeared to be. This vision of Tenma was a sorry thing. He sat in the same corner in the library, papers and books piled on the table beside him, his hair - though at least cut and trim - a mess that falling in his face, shoulders slouched forward, exhaustion clear in every facet of his outward presentation. At times he would sit back in his chair and stare at the ceiling, and then the bags under his eyes became truly visible, dark and telling of how little he was sleeping. Two apple cores to his left spoke volumes of his eating habits - healthy foods, but certainly not proper meals.

Not even the great Kenzo Tenma was immune to the degradation of exam week. It just manifested differently.

“Is there...something I can help you with, Rudi?”

He blinked, realizing that Tenma had looked over at him. Rudi swallowed, looking back down at his papers. He’d gotten careless, let his mind wander while he was looking at Tenma. Embarrassing...he couldn’t let that happen again. Slowly Rudi shook his head, turning to a fresh page.

“No, nothing.”

He wasn’t rude, but he was certainly curt; he had more important things to do than entertain Tenma’s conversational ways. But that only seemed to bother his fellow student more, Tenma’s expression turning pensive.

“You’re sure? You look a little out of it.”

A jab at his exhausted appearance masked as worry for his health...Tenma’s regard for him was truly low, to view him as little more than a sweaty college student. As if he himself was much better off. But Rudi continued to take the high road, shaking his head and offering a polite, mild smile.

“No, I was just lost in thought. Don’t worry about it.”

Tenma chuckled, nodding as he turned his own attention back to his textbooks.

“Well, all right then. Good luck on the last day…”

It seemed to be enough to sate the other student. Thank god, he needed to get back to studying. Which worked for another hour or so, until three students - painfully _loud_ \- came to sit with Tenma, to “study” with him. It was then that Rudi chose to take his leave, missing the wave from his adversary as he left.

Even back in his dorm, his mind was a buzzing mess. It was sickeningly becoming clear to Rudi that he just didn’t have that firm of a grasp on the material. Not enough to make the grades he needed. It didn’t _matter_ to him that this class was notoriously known for its difficulty, with even an 82% or higher a rare grade; he absolutely _would_ have the highest grade in his class. But the way things were now….he wouldn’t succeed.

He _knew_ he wouldn’t succeed.

He could cover the laws themselves, at least in their basic form. His greatest understanding was in modern law and ethics, but having to defend a case or determine the laws being bypassed by medical practitioners within specific situations was killing him; they were never clear-cut and easy in the practice tests, not like they were in the textbook itself...which itself was both annoying and misleading. Classifying the different types of malpractice and ethics violations...citing historical laws...recognizing significant violations to these laws and the years of any major changes...it was all a jumble in his mind. And then of course there were the different organizations and committees dedicated to medical law. He could cite off enough about the World Association for Medical Law, but the smaller, local committees had covered an entire section in the course and at most he could recall a meagre handful. 

He didn’t have _time._

He didn’t have any choice at this point.

On the one hand, he could accept the fact that, at best, he would probably clear the top fifteen in Medical Law. _Probably_ the top ten, but allowing himself a failure buffer meant he wouldn’t be disappointed if his marks turned out lower than anticipated. 

No matter how much he studied now, that was all he would manage. That was his best case scenario. But there _was_ a way...a risk, a dangerous risk he could take, but…

If he wanted to surpass Tenma again, he had no choice. He needed to resort to drastic measures.

* * *

Rudi certainly felt shameful as he approached his seat in the large auditorium. He could feel the scratch sheet brushing against his wrist under his sleeve, numbness starting from his toes and working upward as he sat down. He wasn’t a particularly anxious person, but this was different. If he was caught...cheating on an exam like this...it wasn’t taken lightly. The risk was high, but so was the reward if he succeeded.

Pencils scratching against paper filled the silent room, the ominous ambience seemingly louder with the lack of any real noise beyond the faint scratching of graphite. He kept his eyes on the paper, looking up only a few times to check the clock, and to watch the proctor sitting at the front. He would occasionally stand to walk between the aisles, but he mostly sat in the front. Rudi had to time this carefully.

He made to scratch at his arm, tugging lightly at his sleeve. There was nothing strange to see, he was just itching at his arm….

A quick glance up. The proctor hadn’t looked. 

Rudi pulled his sleeve a little more, revealing the key notes he’d taken. Not everything, only for topics he knew he had no chance of scoring marks in. He jotted answers, glancing up now and again to make sure the proctor hadn’t noticed anything. That ominous echo in the background seemed to grow louder, ringing in his ears all the way until he’d let his sleeve back down, covering the offending slip of paper.

He wiped his brow, exhaling slowly. Another quick glance to his left, and then to his r..ight...

The colour left Rudi’s face as he stared at his classmate, Tenma staring back for the briefest moment, that cold and intense gaze flicking back to his paper shortly after.

He saw.

There was no way he didn’t.

Out of everyone to catch him cheating...that it was _Tenma…_

How stupid could he have been….he should’ve been more careful. Tenma was going to report him. There was no way he wouldn’t. This was his chance to put Rudi out entirely, to _really_ humiliate him. His eyes shot down to his paper and he waited, heart leaping into his throat.

One minute and nothing.

Two.

Nothing…

A brief sidelong glance at Tenma saw him back at work on the exam paper. Was his plan...to wait until after the exam? Or perhaps he would confront Rudi after the fact and make him confess voluntarily. Someone like Tenma...he wouldn’t make a show of it, not in an auditorium like this. It was definitely going to be after the exam.

* * *

As the auditorium cleared out, Rudi expected to be tagged by the Japanese student. But nothing happened; they cleared out, everyone entering the hallway with no consideration to the other students that might be studying or waiting for their exams, loudly professing their hatred of medical law, glad that it was over. Rudi couldn’t stand the noise; with one last look for Tenma, he made his way down the hall and through the doors, out into the late afternoon light. He wasn’t really one for the outdoors, but the courtyard was quiet now with exams underway, and a breath of fresh air would help clear his head.

Tenma could have approached him already, but he hadn’t. Instead he’d just followed the crowd out of the auditorium like nothing had happened. Why wait? Was there something else he had to gain by waiting? Was he hoping that Rudi would confront him?

He tensed when he saw Tenma look his way, then detach himself from the trio of students he had been standing with, walking over to Rudi - though, the smile he often had was more subdued. No doubt he was as exhausted as everyone else. He crossed the courtyard, stopping a little ways from Rudi.

“A few of us were going for drinks later this evening, to celebrate being done with exams for the semester. If you’d like to join us, we can meet there...we’re going to the Bierhaus down the street from the public library. Apparently it’s traditionally where most students go after exams.”

Rudi waited a moment, listening quietly for any catch - _and we can talk about the exam._ But nothing came, Tenma was just looking at him, waiting.

So this was a real offer, then.

Rudi looked up, giving a short nod. “I’ll think about it. Thanks.”

He probably wouldn’t go, he wasn’t much of a social drinker. With one friend or two, maybe, but these weren’t really _friends_ of his. Tenma turned with another wave, but there was nothing to show any sort of disdain. He really had only come along to extend an invitation...but that did nothing to quell the concern that crawled under Rudi’s skin. Tenma saw him cheating. He’d want to talk about it eventually.

* * *

Rudi spent the rest of the evening in his dorm, having what was left of the pizza from the previous night for dinner. He was perfectly content just to relax the rest of the evening and that night; he didn’t particularly feel _celebratory_ given the unknowns floating in his future. Spending the evening in bed...maybe with a few episodes of some crime drama to pass the time...that would be a pleasant way to spend the night.

But that offer kept at the back of his mind; Tenma had gone out of his way to invite him for drinks, had made no mention of his cheating at all. Was he _expected_ to accept? Would they discuss it there, while inebriated? Or perhaps Tenma thought he had a better tolerance to alcohol...and Rudi would spill it all while drunk. What Tenma didn’t know was that Rudi was very much able to hold his liquor. 

Whatever the reason...Rudi couldn’t get it off his mind. Even relaxing with pizza and television, something usually able to fully numb him to distractions, did nothing to dull those thoughts.

In the end, Rudi found himself heading to the bar after all.

Pushing open the door to the Bierhaus, Rudi took a look around. There were plenty of filled tables, to be sure, but largely by middle-aged men. The number of student bodies was significantly lower than he expected, and not one of them looked like Tenma. He checked his watch. He _was_ a little early, but given the sort of person Tenma was...he would’ve expected him to turn up _early._

Then again, he’d planned to have drinks with a few of their classmates. They could have kept him back for one reason or another. He wasn’t very aggressive or forward, quicker to simply go along with others than stand up for himself.

Rudi took one of the only empty tables left, toward the back. He deposited his jacket over the back of the chair, for now simply sitting and observing. He watched everyone that came through the door, quietly inventing their story in his mind based on what little he could glean from their appearance and mannerisms; one man was out of a job - or at least suffering in his current position - and another was dealing with troubles of the opposite sex, if his longing looks toward female patrons were anything to judge by. There were two men that followed, in considerably higher spirits - probably out for a guys' night.

Rudi had invented stories for five individuals before he finally saw the prim and proper Kenzo Tenma walk through those doors, notably alone. He had changed since they spoke, wearing a more relaxed dark blue jacket over a lighter blue polo shirt, and beige slacks. He looked just as dazed and confused as Rudi had when he first stepped inside - the bizarre effect of passing across a threshold, causing all current thoughts to be emptied in the moment.

Deeper hazel eyes finally found Rudi, and the exchange student’s complexion brightened just a little. Rudi, on the other hand, had narrowed his eyes, clasping his hands in front of him, fingers laced loosely together, thumbs resting beneath his chin.

“I was worried it might just be me by myself. I’m glad you came.”

Tenma sounded cheerful and friendly. Rudi glanced at the door, then back at Tenma. “You were stood up?”

Tenma looked away, rubbing the back of his neck with an awkward little chuckle. 

“Not really. I guess Becker and Rolf weren't feeling well..so they had to cancel. I would have stayed behind myself, but I didn't know if you would come, so…” He gave an awkward shrug.

Rolf and Becker were names Rudi was only vaguely familiar with. But it seemed like a genuine story. For a moment he had wondered if this was the plan all along - for Tenma to meet only Rudi here, so that finally, _finally_ he could have his talk about the exam.

He was sure that was still going to come up.

“So what made you accept my offer?”

He and Tenma had their drinks now, and were just sitting...idly….by themselves. It was strange...Rudi would never have imagined this scenario at the end of the exam period. The two greatest intellects of their year, and they were having drinks together.

But why _had_ Rudi accepted? The answer was embarrassing. To think that Tenma had so totally dominated his thoughts that even something so meaningless became the forefront of his focus..

“I’m not really sure, to be honest.” He took a slow sip of his own drink. “I suppose I just didn’t have anything better to do.”

Tenma gave him a look that could almost be called _sympathetic_ , shrugging his shoulder. “Well, I’m glad I could get you out of your dorm! It seems like we never talk, even though we’re in all these classes together. I think that’s too bad, honestly.”

Rudi peered over the rim of his glass, hodling it to his lips as an excuse not to respond. He really wasn’t sure what Tenma was getting at with all this...if he was trying to get friendly with Rudi just to tear him down with that reveal of his cheating, it wasn’t going to work.

Instead, he decided to probe.

Setting his drink down, he glanced at his rival with a warmer look. “So tell me, Tenma, how do you think you did on the exam?”

There was a pause, Tenma raising a hand and shaking his head. “You know...you _can_ call me Kenzo...we’re classmates. You don’t have to be so formal.” He relaxed after a moment then, downing a little more of his drink. “But to be honest I’m not sure. Medical Law was never my strong suit. I’m a little worried, really.” 

Eyes flicked up to meet Rudi’s, warm and friendly as ever. There wasn’t a hint of malice. 

“What about you?”

The question caught him a little off guard. What about….

He really was trying to get Rudi to confess.

No, it wasn’t going to work like that. If Tenma wanted to talk about what he saw, he was going to have to bring it up himself. Rudi would maintain his stance; he wasn’t about to cower to his adversary just because he saw him cheating...if Tenma had even the slightest concept of what went on in his mind, why he did what he did…

“I really don’t know. I guess we’ll have to see.”

He watched Tenma carefully, but even still there was nothing out of place about his expression. He just...nodded, smiling that warm smile, and raised his glass toward Rudi. 

“Well, in any case, here’s to being done.”

Rudi raised his own glass with mild reluctance; it seemed an innocent enough reply, nothing threatening about how he said it. They downed their glasses, each ordering another. They didn’t have any more exams to deal with; Rudi had no problem indulging himself a little.

Even if he couldn’t claim victory in their exams, Rudi could at least claim victory here and now, watching with much sobriety as Tenma very quickly lost the battle with his own drinks. Not even two in...he really was a lightweight.

It was odd, this entire situation….Tenma allowing himself to let loose so much with a relative stranger - a classmate, but not a _friend_. The psychoanalyst in Rudi was curious just what sort of drunk his classmate was. Chatty, weepy, angry, philosophical? 

He certainly hadn’t expected that he would wind up responsible for an inebriated Tenma this evening. That hadn’t remotely been a part of the plan. But, he was only just starting to get tipsy, still relatively coherent and sane. If...if a little _off._ He was looking at Rudi with a slightly unfocused gaze and a mild smile.

“I’m really glad you came. I’m glad.”

Rudi took a sip of his drink - most definitely his last, just in case - and glanced quickly toward the bartender. Hopefully Tenma didn’t plan on any more drinks himself.

“Well...you’re welcome, I suppose.”

He wasn’t really sure what else to say. He’d already been told that, but Tenma probably didn’t remember right at the moment. He still had that slightly unfocused stare, snapping back to attention after a moment.

“I’m really glad. I didn’t think you would. You’re very smart…”

More than a _little_ tipsy. Still, Rudi smiled, just a little.

“Well, thank you. The same is true of you, of course.”

Tenma’s smile brightened just a little, somehow still looking radiant even when he wasn’t fully ‘himself’ so to speak.

“You should know. I’ve always admired you. You’re the brightest mind in our class and I hope that you know that that’s how I feel. You should be proud.”

Now it was starting to sound ridiculous. Rudi rubbed his neck, glancing away. “That’s….”

What was he supposed to say to that? True enough it was coming from a slightly unsteadied mind, but Tenma wasn’t that far gone. There was probably some truth to those words, in which case...that look he was so sure of, the condescending leer in Tenma’s eyes...was it something else? It was possible he had misjudged, only seeing condescension because he wanted to. 

That still didn’t answer why he hadn’t said anything about Rudi and his cheating.

He could ask now...truthfully it was probably the ideal time to ask Tenma about it, if he wanted to get the most honest answer out of his classmate. But in a way it felt wrong - he’d rather hear from a completely coherent Tenma, in full intellectual capacity, rather than this...bleeding-hearted, sappy Tenma. He watched as the Japanese man shifted, seeming a bit restless for a moment, rubbing his temples.

“I’m starting to feel...a little...off. It might be a good time to…”

Oh, _starting_ to feel off. Rudi quirked a brow, chuckling despite himself. “My friend, you’ve been off for the last half hour. But I think you’re right. Water, then?” He paused, narrowing his eyes for a moment. “And you didn’t drive, did you?”

It wasn’t that far from campus. Two or three minutes driving, or ten or so to walk. Rudi wasn’t entirely sure about Tenma walking that distance back on his own, though. He wasn’t completely smashed or anything, but with his classmate exhausted from the past week of exams _and_ buzzed, he’d just feel better accompanying him - at least as far as campus. 

“Oh no. I walked. Of course.”

Rudi nodded. “Then whenever you’re ready, we should head back.”

* * * * *

It was a quiet walk back to campus, for the most part. Tenma was quick to come back to his senses once he had a glass of water in him, returning to the colder, quieter Tenma he was used to. Most likely all those sentiments from earlier were an exaggeration induced by drink. Still, he did turn to smile at Rudi once they reached the dorms, stopping before they parted ways.

“I want to thank you for humouring me. I had a good time, even if I got stiffed by my friends.”

Rudi looked down, clearing his throat - which had in that moment become unexpectedly dry. If Tenma hadn’t been such a flatterer when he was tipsy…

“Well...yes. It was better than what I had planned for the evening, anyway.”

Only partially true. He did like his crime dramas and psych thrillers, but those invasive thoughts about Tenma’s offer had made it almost unbearable. He watched as Tenma gave that same, radiant smile as before, _definitely_ back to himself.

“Well anyway...good luck, again. I hope you do well on the exam.”

* * *

Rudi didn’t sleep much that night - though it was no fault of the liquor. Rather, Tenma continued to weigh on his mind, their bizarre encounter jostling all that he thought he knew. He had been so certain that Tenma hated him, looked down on him. But what evidence did he have? The way that Tenma looked at him was distant, certainly, but was it unkind? And what he’d said…

He admired Rudi. Admired him.

Tenma definitely knew what he was saying. Was that really how he felt? Something that a sober Tenma simply couldn’t, or wouldn’t, admit? Something he _feared_ to admit?

...Maybe he was looking at it wrong the whole time. He’d been so obsessed with Tenma - on dissecting his every word to Rudi, on trying to understand how he felt towards his primary rival. So much energy was being spent on understanding Tenma’s psyche that he’d forgotten one of the most important rules of interpersonal analysis. Just as much as he needed to analyse the other, he needed to analyse the self.

Looking inward told Rudi a very different story. A man who spent so much time focusing not only on school, but on his primary rival - Kenzo Tenma - while that student seemed to pay him only minimal attention. No competition had ever been outwardly stated; it was Rudi who saw their relationship as an intellectual battle, while Tenma seemed in a constant state of ease. The polite way of speaking….his greetings and well-wishing...they were never intended as derogatory statements toward Rudi. The one who perceived them as such was himself.

Why pour so much time and thought into how Tenma viewed him?

Why deliberately sabotage kind words and interpret them in the most negative light?

Rudi knew, of course. All it took was a night’s introspection. It was so simple...

He wanted Tenma to acknowledge him as an intellectual equal. He wanted Tenma to see him as more than just another one of their classmates. He craved recognition. And perhaps...he was jealous, too.

In his own frustration, he sabotaged every kind word spoken by Tenma, viewing his every friendly gesture in the negative, attempting to disprove it - Tenma couldn’t possibly like him, not when he was so much more popular with the rest of their classmates, who clearly didn’t give a damn about him.

To imagine...that all this time, Tenma had admired him. 

Rudi had to wonder...if Tenma catching him cheating had ruined that.

There was something else though, something else about his self-analysis, a result he wasn’t quite sure….about the nature of his hyperfocus on Tenma, and…

...Well...he needed more information to be sure.

* * *

It was excruciating, waiting to receive his final grade. Even worse every time he passed Tenma. School had been released for the summer, so most students living on residence were taking the time to visit family over the summer. There were some students who stayed though - mostly those taking summer classes, and those who had year round occupancy. Both he and Tenma were taking the summer Health Care Economics course; it would free up time in an otherwise busy upcoming semester, and the summer courses tended to be more effective anyway.

He really wasn’t surprised to see Tenma taking it. But there still hadn’t been a single word on the exam. Was it possible that he’d notified the professor in private? Or was he keeping it to himself for some reason? Blackmail for later?

When the marks finally came back, and Rudi didn’t just pass, but was _top of the class_ , he was confounded.

Tenma hadn’t said anything.

Even though he saw Rudi cheating...he hadn’t said a word.

Sitting in the small classroom, waiting for their lecture to begin, all Rudi did was ponder on it - on what that meant. As usual, Tenma was the second one to arrive, waving and taking a seat next to Rudi. He turned with a smile, flipping open his notebook.

“So, how did you do? I actually…” Tenma shook his head sheepishly. “I missed a couple easy marks. I must not have been thinking clearly. I didn’t do that badly though.”

 _Still_ denying it. The grades were in, so why hide what he knew? Before Rudi could say anything more though, the last two students dawdled their way into the classroom, followed shortly by their professor. If he was going to address the issue it would have to be after class. He could address Tenma during the ten minute coffee break halfway through the lecture, but he’d rather have more time. Just in case.

It felt longer than usual; even though it was three hours, Rudi usually found that the lectures never _felt_ terribly painful, but then again he never had such urgent thoughts infiltrating his mind like he did now. 

When class was over, Rudi collected his books and stuffed them in his bag, waiting for Tenma. He looked tired, like he hadn’t slept the night before...but knowing that their grades were coming in...Rudi couldn’t blame him. He shuffled out of the lecture room behind Tenma, taking strides down the hall. When he was sure there was no one else to hear them, he took a few longer strides to close the distance, reaching out and - with just a little force - taking hold of Tenma’s shoulder in an effort to stop him in his tracks. His classmate jolted, head jerking over his shoulder as he tensed up, only to let out a sigh of relief when he saw who it was, though he looked troubled all the same.

“Rudi, what-”

“I want you to tell me why.”

Tenma looked uncomprehending, eyes flicking forward, as though looking for a way to avoid whatever the clearly perturbed Rudi had to say. 

“I don’t know what you mean. Why what?”

Rudi relaxed his grip a little - there was no need to come across as aggressive; he had Tenma’s attention now, that was what mattered.

“I know you saw. You saw me. You didn’t say anything. Why? Holding onto that for later? Or do I owe you a favour now? Money?”

“Rudi you’re going to have to be clear with me. I don’t know what you’re talking about. What did I see? Where’s this all coming from?”

There was nothing frustrated or false in Tenma’s tone - he was confused and a little concerned. Then again, Rudi hadn’t directly stated what he meant. He had hoped Tenma would infer it on his own, but if he had to be direct, then…

He looked away, looked down, and released Tenma’s shoulder completely. He could feel that shame bubbling up, such a disgusting feeling.

“You saw me cheating that day. I know you did. The Medical Law exam. You looked right at me.” He looked up slowly, eyes piercing as he looked over Tenma. He seemed to understand now, recognition dawning across his classmate’s face. Rudi balled a fist.

“So what now. Do I buy your silence? What is it you want from me? An explanation? I would understand if you lost respect for me over it. But I want you to be straight with me about this. I can’t stand the silence. It’s suffocating.”

Tenma took a deep breath, letting it out with a sigh, closing his eyes and rubbing the back of his neck.

“If I’m being honest, I really didn’t care about that at all. I ch…”

He looked up abruptly, then around the hall, lowering his voice so only Rudi could hear.

“I cheated too.”

It was Rudi’s turn to look on, uncomprehending. Tenma just gave a sheepish chuckle.

“I didn’t want it to drag my grades down. And actually...a few of us did the same thing. I guess everyone had the same idea...but Rudi….”

Tenma’s expression became a little more serious then, and he cocked his head a little. “If you thought I don’t respect you because I saw you cheating….if you’ve been feeling that way since the exam...I’m sorry about that. I’m not the best at telling someone outwardly how I feel about them. You’re...well I sort of told you, I suppose...when we had drinks together. I really do admire you, Rudi. You’re an incredibly intelligent person; to be honest I was always a little intimidated. You seemed very intense, but I’ve always wanted to get to know you better.”

It was everything he’d wanted to hear, all at once, as if Tenma somehow knew. But more than that, the sudden flutter of his heart, his face heating up…

Shit.

So then he really…

He wasn’t just obsessed with Tenma intellectually. At this point it was impossible to deny the attraction; he hadn’t been sure before, but now…

_Shit._

Tenma was looking at him, perplexed and a little concerned. _He always did have a charming face, even when he was worried._

“....Is that so.”

It was the best response he could come up with in the moment, raising a hand to rub at his face - mostly in the hopes of concealing the faint flush on his cheeks. He didn’t know if it was working, Tenma didn’t say anything to indicate otherwise…in fact, he just chuckled and gave a fonder sort of smile, shaking his head.

“I said too much, didn’t I? I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to put you on the spot...”

I’m sorry for this...I’m sorry for that….was there anything Tenma _wasn’t_ somehow sorry for? Rudi shook his head, waving a hand once he’d collected himself from the initial shock.

“No, don’t be. I guess I never tried to understand you either, so it’s...not all your fault, that we never spoke before. But I wouldn’t mind…” He tried his best to brighten a little, smiling a little smile at his classmate. “I wouldn’t mind starting now. Getting to know you I mean.”

Tenma brightened, his eyes practically glittering for a moment. “I’m glad. Then, coffee this saturday? How does that sound?” His expression shifted, just the slightest bit cheeky. “We could call it what you owe me. So you’d best think twice before declining.” 

Rudi rolled his eyes and scoffed, though he was still smiling. Oh, _clever_.

“Well, I guess I don’t have much choice. Very well then, Tenma, I accept.”

Tenma gave him a look, narrowing his eyes for a moment.

“I’d like to add one condition. You have to call me Kenzo. You’re the only person in our class who doesn’t. Is that fair?”

Rudi grimaced, looking up for a moment. _Kenzo._ It just...it felt strange, but then...if he _wanted_ to be called Kenzo then...that was fine.

“I think I’ll manage.”

Tenma didn’t look satisfied. He raised his chin, quirking his brows at Rudi then, animated and demanding. He wanted him to….

_Fine._

“I think I’ll manage….Kenzo.”

There it was, that sunlit smile. “Good, then, I’ll see you. Saturday around noon?”

Rudi nodded.

“I’ll be there.”

**Author's Note:**

> Wow. Writing college Rudi is so fun ngl. He wound up being WAY more tsun and proud than I thought, but I imagine Rudi as a college student being rather prideful…
> 
> I hope my tipsy Tenma came off alright, lmao I've not been around enough drunk (or mildly drunk) people to accurately write it
> 
> This fic really brought me back to exam week hell memories…heh


End file.
